I am a Mormon

www.mormon.org Ever heard of it? It is great. Real people, real stories, real inspiration for me to be a better person! I would like to share my part of the website.

My name is Lucky Day. I am 20 years old and I am attending Brigham Young University in Provo, UT. My major? Linguistics My minor? Political Science My grades? Improvable. (is "improvable" a word???) I was born in Nashville, TN with a serious heart defect. I was missing the interventricular septum also know as the wall separating the lower chamber of the heart...kinda important...so the blood was going all the wrong places...

I had one open heart surgery at just a few weeks old. My parents came out to UT about 2 years after I was born and I underwent two more open heart surgeries at Primary Children Medical Center.

Each day I wake up I remember how blessed I am to be alive. Without the Lord's hand, I would not be here today. My Heavenly Father blessed me with my life and it is my privilege to serve His children each day.

Some days I wake up and feel so overwhelmed with problems of the world. If I become stressed or consumed in my life then I begin to lose track of others and focus only on myself. But how can I or anyone live with a complete inward focus? I find service and giving as important for the body as oxygen and water. Reaching out to others seems to provide a stimulation for the brain and body. I am always happier when I serve others first and forget myself!

I am grateful to be alive and have these opportunities! True happiness cannot be attained with money, fame or nice cars. That is only superficial happiness that will fade quickly. Love and Charity, the pure love of Christ, will engrave happiness into our hearts, minds and souls. There is nothing more marvelous that we can give others!

I am just one person trying to find my way and make my mark. I am a student learning all that I can about the world. I am a survivor remembering that each day I am lucky to be alive. My name is Lucky Day and I am a Mormon.

What's Next

I am almost done with this semester...and by almost I mean I have a a month or so left. I am studying for finals and thinking about next semester, but not TOO mush because next semester will be very stressful. The future has been on my mind a lot lately. I am thinking about graduate school and JOBS...never done that before. I always knew that I would grow up and go to college and get married...didn't put a TON of thought into job searching and insurance and benefits and salary. Now I am ready to think about those BIG decisions. So what's next? Do you know? What are you doing? Are you ready for the future? I hope you are...cause I am not. I should be getting ready though. Ok, let's work hard and study harder and get good grades and be the very best. Deal.

Saints and Soldiers trailer

Veteran's Day

Today is Veteran's Day...and I forgot. Did you forget? Probably...but if you didn't then PROPS! Anyway, I just came from a College Republicans meeting and it was great! The speaker was an Vietnam Veteran and I enjoyed listening to his story. Why are American's free? Because those men and women gave their lives. Even if they did not die on the battle field, they gave up their homes, families and work to go and fight in a war. many came back with bullets embedded in their bodies; some came back with arms or legs or eyes missing; some came back unable to walk or work ever again and almost all came back with emotional and mental scarring and memories to fill their dreams.

We are FREE to work, travel, live and go to school where we want. We are FREE to socialize with, date and marry whom we desire. We are FREE to stand up for our religious beliefs and defend that sacred constitution that our Founding Fathers were inspired to write. PLEASE do not forget your freedoms. PLEASE do not forget the soldier whose body was left on the battle field. Do not forget those men who went through the very worst conditions so we can have the very best conditions. I love America! I love our freedoms! I love our soldiers and I thanks my Heavenly Father everyday for those blessings.

Without knowing it was Veteran's Day, last night I watched the movie, "Saints and Soldiers." It is a great film and it helps me remember those who fought and are fighting in war. I have posted the trailer. I would recommend this movie for everyone.

I am...changing

Can I change? Do I actually have the ability to change? I wonder. I wonder if I have the power to make my life better. The hole I have dug is deep and scary. The hole I live in has become comfortable. I do not think I am worthy to change. I have made so many mistakes, but can I make it? Am I deserving of happiness NOW? I wonder. Can I make amends with the people I have hurt? Can I show them that I am not happy with my choices? Am I deserving of help from anyone including my Heavenly Father? I wonder. I wonder if I will be able to have a good relationship with the people I love the most. I wonder if I can become someone that deserves love.
I hope. I hope that I can change and make myself a better person. I hope that I will learn from my stupidity. I hope that change is possible. I hope that I can have good relationships in my life. Happiness in life is entirely a matter of choice. I have made the choice, can I make the change? I hope.
I am terrified. I am scared of making more wrong decisions. I am scared that I will end up alone.
I am sorry. I am sorry to those that I hurt. I am sorry for making your life a living heck. I am sorry you have to witness my life. I am sorry I am prideful.
I am humbled. I am empty inside feeling sick for the choices I have made.
I am lost. I am walking alone because I have pushed away everyone who would have put up with my attitude.
I am changing. Because when I think of you, my person, the only person I have, I start to cry. I am changing because I don't think I can live with myself. I am changing because I am tired of me.

Good Things to Come

The Truth about Me, Lucky Day

The sad truth is...I am imperfect. I am a being that makes mistakes everyday. No matter the effort, perfection is out of the question. I live in a hole. Physically and metaphorically. My hole is small and cramped. With all of my problems and mistakes, I am usually alone in my hole. Once in a while I make room for another person. I allow someone to be close to me. To be my good friend and "person" to turn to. Perhaps I even allow a romantic relationship to evolve. Sometimes there is room enough for 2. BUT more often than not, I do not make extra space for someone. My heart is a closed vault with cement and lasers guarding it. My pride is its defense, standing guard at all times ready to fight off any chance of an intruder. I am alone. Sometimes, I do not choose to be alone...no one really wants to be alone no matter their defensive pride. Sometimes, I am alone because I am comfortable alone. I do not want to break through the barrier. I fear that I am incapable of having people to be with. I have friends that I can chat casually with and friends that I can sit with in my classes, but I do not have friends to share my secrets with or be myself with. I fear that loneliness is in my future forever. No matter how hard I try to step outside my bubble, I remain enclosed and far off from people. I don't understand. I don't understand why I am going to a great university with great people and I can only manage distant friends. I hate being alone. I don't have room for 2. I don't have anybody.

Recently...

I have been feeling very happy lately and that is probably due to the fact that I am BACK IN SCHOOL! It is a fabulous feeling to be hitting the books and studying all night and reading books and taking tests...I could go on, but I will stop. I am taking PD Bio 220 which = ANATOMY! I have the incredible opportunity to work on cadavers (which I treat with the utmost respect, by the way). Cadavers are so fascinating, but they have a terrible smell which sometimes get to me when I have not eaten. I have an obsession with the human body and find it very useful that I am my own personal cheat sheet in the testing center...so good.
My garden was in full bloom and I harvested the delectable veggies. Sadly I am almost out of onions, which is weird because I never thought I liked onions. Tomatoes are growing on me, but never beets. I HATE beets. It was a fun process and now I am back in my hole...although the one I live in now is QUITE a bit bigger than my Hawaiian hole.
SPEAKING of Hawaii...I miss it...a lot. I miss the sand and the beach and the humidity and the small-ness and the palm trees and the people. I love Hawaii so much and it is truly Heaven on Earth. Hawaii was a wonderful experience that will forever hold a dear place in my heart. As for now, I must move on and accept the mainland as it is.And it is wonderful.
I have been thinking a lot lately....actually I think all the time, but now I am voicing my thoughts.
FIRST: I think it would be extremely romantic to marry a soldier. Gotta love a man in uniform. I have been day dreaming about seeing my make-believe soldier after he returns from months over seas. It was so romantic, but I don't think I could ever REALLY marry a soldier. I do not like to be alone.
SECOND:I am soooooooo excited for HALLOWEEN. It is a fabulous holiday that should be celebrated to it's fullest. I am going to decorate my apartment and get a costume and watch scary movies and have a party. What could be better?
THIRD: I know what could be better than Halloween...THANKSGIVING! I am obsessed with Thanksgiving. Maybe because we get to give thanks and eat around a giant table...but maybe because we just get to eat lots of good food. I have been researching recipes for the past month and I will share those recipes as soon as I narrow down the list. It is like Santa's list...but nothing on my list is bad, maybe fattening, but NEVER bad.
Because I mentioned Santa, I had better mention my preparations for CHRISTMAS! I have been singing and listening to Christmas songs for the past month as well. It is sooooooooooooo exciting I can hardly contain myself. But I cannot be too excited.

Everything outside is beautiful, the trees, the buildings and the sidewalks. I love this season, but I could never get married during the fall. I would be forced to choose either a gross orange color for bridesmaid, a boring brown or a red...and I do NOT look good with red anywhere near my body.

Just Wait

As a new Gardener I must remind myself time and time again that patience is VITAL! I planted all sorts of fabulous green things and now I have to wait for them to spring up! I guess waiting is a part of life and more importantly love, not that I am comparing love to a butternut squash, but you know. I find that waiting is something I have always struggled with...and then when I get it, I want the next step. Perhaps I should enjoy life now instead of always hoping for the next scene to play on stage! I love the feeling I get when I see the my garden early in the morning. I see the plants growing above the ground and all I want to do yank my onion plant up and see how big it is getting! But there's a bad idea... if I performed such an act the onion would immediately be dead an un-edible. Such can be compared to the blooming (or unblooming) relationship. Why rip it from the roots if it is just beginning to grow. Have patience. I tell myself to not give up on my onion love and just wait.

Gardening: My new favorite hobby

It is official, I love to garden! It all started when, well I don't really know when it started, but hey, I still love it! Gardening is full of life metaphors and being the English major I was, I love a good metaphor. Probably the best part of gardening is the power the gardener has. The gardener has all control on what will live or die. Watering is a choice and weeding can be a trial. These choices and trials will lead the garden to a magnificent harvest or jungle of weeds and little fruit. Weeding is by far the most annoying task to any gardener, but me, I LOVE weeding. At a time in life when one has no power over one's life, weeding can bring a sense of power back. It is incredible the feeling I have when I pull a weed out of the ground and see all the little roots come up with it. I personally regain confidence and have a more sure feeling of power. I start to believe that I have power over some things in life even if it's just the weeds.

Call me the Tortoise

The infamous story of the tortoise and the hare is one find quite intriguing and easy to relate to. I know that I am one of billions of people and that my life seems insignificant to others BUT I am the tortoise. Why? Because I am slow and boring...well in a sense. Wedding plans, parties, plays, ballets and school projects engulf my family right now. My life consists of nothing exciting...well except for this blog and my Revolutionary War book. So, like the tortoise, the hare(s) is/are passing me by at LIGHTENING speed while I continue slowly but steadily in the back. No one really sees me now, but no worries because the tortoise will make a grand appearance eventually and the tortoise and the hare will live happily ever after...until the the next race. I watch everyone live their dreams and happiest moments, in fact, I have front row tickets, but I'm not bitter. Anxious, YES, but patient and willing to wait for my time to shine. Call me Dan, in real life!

Peaches and Cream...I think not

This week has been the week from heck. I am sorely disappointed in life right now and what it offers me. I hate to sit and complain about the boring yet sad life I lead, so instead I will simply offer and opinion. My opinion is disregarded by most people, but because I enjoy reading my blog I write for my future satisfaction.
It is a truth hardly acknowledged that life is a all zippidy-doo-dah and flowers. Most people especially in America, France and Denmark (or so I hear) are negative and find that a smile is too difficult to muster once a day. That would describe my precise feeling. I am this close to selling knives or dropping out of school and going to a tech school...(nothing wrong with that)I have put my best foot forward and hopped on what I thought was the "right track." Little did I know that I had put my best foot forward landing in quick sand and am about to get run over by a train. Whenver I have a good feeling about life and the future, life and the future have a bad feeling about me. It seems that when you think that sun is going to shine in the morning, it decides to shine on China for a few more days, weeks or months. Life is like a roller coaster: you have to ride the ups and downs. Life is like an airport: expect delays. Suddenly, my hole in the wall is looking VERY inviting. Like the great country singer Darryl Worley said,
"Sounds like life to me it ain’t no fantasy
It’s just a common case of everyday reality
Man I know it’s tough but you gotta suck it up
To hear you talk you’re caught up in some tragedy
It sounds like life to me"
So, I am pulling myself from out of the quicksand, dodging the train before I am road kill and signing out.

Out there...

After three months I have come to the end of what I would call one of the best t.v. shows ever made. It all started in January...back in those days when I was depressed and living in a small hole...yeah, you remember. ANYWAY, I was bored and found my way to youtube where I decided to watch the first episode of "Full House." It became an obsession and my fave t.v. show. Let me tell you this, I was very EMbarrassed when my friends caught me in the act. I guess it is safe to say that this 80's and 90's series is cheesy and tacky and very predictable BUT I will say that it is funny and lovable and yes...TENDER! I think that the biggest reason I love "Full House" is the focus on the family. Obviously the focus is the family, seeing as the plot is centered around a family living in the same house. After watching the series, I have come to realize that other t.v. shows out there DO NOT focus on the family. I will give examples. #1 "Modern Family" To start, it is a TERRIBLE show. The family is broken and messed up. The combination of divorce, re-marriage, gay-marriage and more. Why would anyone want a family like that? And who would think of it as a laughing matter? Show #2 "House" In all honestly, I am a recovering fan of the Fox drama "House." Sadly, in a way, I was reading a summary for the next episode that will be posted online for web-viewers like myself. I was stunned when I found that the episode was about a couple with an "open-marriage." I cannot think of a worse topic than adultery. As you can tell my disappoint led me to drop "House" as a weekly show for me and turn back to my "Full House." People have told me that I am just too naive and sheltered or that I am too sensitive. My answer is this: I don't like it. These topics are not happy and uplifting. After I watch a t.v. show, I want to feel happy not sick to my stomach. "Full House" may be cheesy and outdated, BUT it is about true love between a man and woman. It is about getting through the tough times of marriage. It is about siblings growing closer and loving each other. It is about teaching your children the right thing to do. "Full House" is about the good things in the world that are slowly but surely disappearing. Where have the standards gone?? I can no longer take the crude talk and immoral behavioral and just WRONG ideals. Many times, even among my own friends, I feel as though I stand alone. Does anybody care about standards?

A New Chapter

All my life I have had a very bad habit. I ALWAYS...ALWAYS read the end of the book before I read the beginning. My reasoning: I want to know if I will like the end and if I don't, then why waste my time reading it. I guess if my life was a book, then you could say that I am a wee bit frustrated. I don't know the end of my "book" so I tend to become impatient when I am nearing the end of a "chapter." Now, my last week in Hawaii has finally come and I am very antsy about getting home. I know what I need to do is thoroughly enjoy these last precious days, but that is hard when it is pouring CONSTANTLY. SO, I am reflecting on the wonderful experience I have had here in Hawaii. I have learned about myself and what I want to do in life. Life is extremely unpredictable..well..the middle is pretty unpredictable. The nice part about life is knowing the end. I know the end of my book, well I know how it CAN end. I am so grateful for the gospel in my life and the knowledge that I have. ANYWAY,
I am happy to be here for a few more days and enjoy the semi-warm weather. I truly love Hawaii and will never forget my experiences here!

American Sign Language

So...about two years ago I was preparing to register for my first semester of classes at BYU-Provo. My dear mother was of course advising me on the different classes I should take and I hold my mother's opinion in the HIGHEST regard. She suggested that I enroll in an ASL class. Afraid of hurting her feelings I reluctantly signed up thinking I would NEVER use it. Thankfully, mothers are given the gift of what I call "The Mantle." Had I not signed up for ASL 101, I would have never learned to talk with my hands...and pretty much there is nothing cooler..except ice cream. (No pun intended...I kill myself!) Anyways, I fell deeply in love with the language and I really can't stop...I have even had a couple dreams in ASL. ALSO, had I not learned ASL I would not have my current church calling as an interpreter in my student ward. Pretty much the best calling ever! (am I allowed to have a favorite calling??) So, yeah...thought I would share my thoughts on ASL. Thanks for reading.

A Change in Me

I have been reflecting on the first day that I arrvied in Laie, HI. I was, as my friend Anne Shirley would say, "in the depths of despair!" I had moved into a dorm room the size of my mother's closet and my roommate and I came from two completely different worlds. In efforts to raise my spirit and analyze my situation I began to write this blog about my life as a hermit. It has been two months since that first day and things have changed from despair to delight. I surprise myself while writing. Why? I never thought that I would consider staying here and graduating from this school...I am torn. Hawaii is a beautiful place but there are a few things I miss about Utah.
1: My amazing family! They mean everything to me.
2: My friends from home...they're great.
3: Homecooking...cafeteria food doesn't quite satsify me the same way. Plus, they serve mainly Oriental food and Polynesian food. It has been too long since I have had Mexican and ITALIAN!
4: Seasons...I like seasons

There are LOTS of things I LOVE about Laie:
1: The beauty...it's like I stepped out of a Jurassic Park movie combined with Baywatch
2: The classes...school is FABuuuuulous. I really love have super small classes so I can better know my teachers and classmates.
3: Campus size! It's small and quaint and comfy...I'm not a small fish in a HUGE school.
4: My friends here... they are great too.
5: Sea level. I can breathe.
6: There's more...

Obivioulsy I don't know what to do with my future. Should I stay or should I go???
I am torn...

Life's Simple Pleasures

Today I reflected on the small things in life that bring me so much pleasure!
I will list them in no particular order:
1: walking outside after a big rainstorm
2: reading a murder mystery on a stormy night
3: walking along the beach wearing a flowing sundress
4: watching an Alfred Hitchcock on Halloween
5: having a BBQ on the Fourth of July
6: drinking hot chocolate in the morning
7: taking a nap on a bench under a blue sky and the shade of a palm tree
8: going to Wendy's with friends after a performance
9: eating movie popcorn with a sprite
10:taking a hot shower after skiing all day
11:doing well on a test
12:writing in a blog
13:getting off an airplane and seeing the people you love after a long time
14:singing around the piano
15:going on a Summer picnic
16:playing golf
17:waking up to the sound of birds
18:exercising
19:a drive in the country
20:smiling for no reason at all

There is my list for now. Of course there is so much more I could have put but I better to homework instead!

Joseph taught me

One of my very favorite stories from the Bible is the story of Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat. It has been my favorite for about twenty-four hours. Most likely because I read a quote about it in my Old Testament manual it talked about how Joseph is a great example of turning a terrible experience into a positive experience. He was sold into Egypt by his own brothers, BUT he turned that around and became the best slave of Potipher. Unfortunately, he was cast into prison. Once again Joseph found a way to come out on top!!!! What a great example of a good attitude and faith in the Lord. He did have the Lord to aid him just as we need the Lord's guidance when we are having tough times (and all the time) I was having a really hard time the past couple days because I recently became and ASL interpreter for a deaf boy in my ward. Don't get me wrong, I love this calling! BUT, it really stressed me out at first! I had no idea how I would accomplish this. The first time I interpreted for him I realized I was being somebody's ears. Have you ever tried to be someone's ears? It is...hard. I was so scared because I had to take what people were saying and tell him. I also realized that people talk really FAST! Slow down Joes for those talking with their hands...please!!! And I am sure that everyone would appreciate it too!!!!!!!!! I learned from Joseph that I can take a bad and scary situation and turn it into something wonderful. I am blessed to be an interpreter because it is a growing experience and a lot of fun! I just need to keep at it!

No title

I write today concerning nothing of importance. I have had some great experiences here. Most recently I went snorkeling and found it very exciting. The coral was very beautiful but I hate to touch it. The fish were scarce and the water was rough. I loved the thrill of being underwater and being able to breathe. I also really like palm trees. They tower over everything and yet they are so skinny. They are not like the oak or pine trees. They are the female of towering trees. Elegant and they flow in the wind. I love just looking at them especially when they are set against a perfectly blue sky!I know that living in Hawaii is supposed to be paradise and it is, just not how most people view paradise. Hawaii is very small and simple. For a tourist this is the ideal vacation. For a local or a resident this place is just a place. I know I should be excited beyond all belief to live here, and I am but I feel that paradise is not paradise unless you make it paradise for yourself.I have had to remember that attitude is more important than location. Hawaii is wonderful because people make it wonderful. I must make it wonderful.

"Lost"...Yes, I was...

In a world such as the one we live in, there are people. People who have achieved something marvelous and extraordinary. People whose faces are as recognizable as the face staring back at you in the mirror. People who deserve a red carpet to walk upon and the headline of every newspaper. People who star in t.v. shows. Yesterday I had the fabuuuuuuulous opportunity to attend the final season premiere of *trumpet sounds* LOST. I had never seen the show, but I was in the company of two of the most adoring fans. This event was the highlight of the year for Hawaii. How privileged I was to witness this historic event. Hundreds of people gathered around the red carpet, that was actually brown, and screamed as stars emerged from their limos. I sat back and observed the insanity of these excited fans. "I'm your biggest fan!" "Sign my arm!" "Meeting you is my destiny!" and even "I want to have your children!" Like I said...a historic event. Personally, I was disappointed. I had always wanted to attend a premiere and be two feet away from a "star", but these "stars" were...not very star-like. The red carpet pictures I have seen on t.v. and in magazines are glamorous and beautiful. The real experience is not so glamorous. The stars look like normal people. They are not more beautiful by any means. They don't have any nicer hair than I do and if I say so myself, my hair was much better. Many of them were very unattractive, no offense, and many were overweight. So, WHY??? Why have we built up these people as amazing and extraordinary? All they have done is memorize lines and smile a lot. Costumer service people memorize lines and smile a lot. What's the big deal?? The answer...they're on t.v.

The Details

In recent events I have received complaints regarding the length and content of my blog posts. According to readers the daily posts are too short and vague. So let me humor them and allow myself to dive into the juicy meat of my life in a hole. For starter, the room. Approximately 14x8 square feet in area and the furniture is pink...well purple...well salmon. This room once belonged to one individual and now occupies 2 people, me being one of them. The one window looks out upon a beautiful brick wall and a clothes line...covered in clothes. My bed however is not next to the window, however because the room is so small, it is not hard to see out. My roommate's bed is about two feet away from mine. This distance makes a very small walkway between beds and often causes traffic jams. I'm not complaining because I love Hawaii, well most of it. It is almost impossible for us to be up and getting ready at the same time due to the lack of, once again, space. I try to spend as little time in my room as possible. My roommate on the other hand spends most of her time in here. I don't know how she stands it. Outside of the room and down the hall is what could pass as a bathroom. It it dirty and also salmon colored. Within our sacred salmon unit (that's the four bedrooms and bathroom in 108) reside many species of bugs. Mainly ants, spiders and cockroaches. They are not my friends and we avoid each other. I never would have thought that I would live in a hole with six and eight-legged creatures, but life is full of surprises. In all honesty, this can be very uncomfortable. It's dirty and dark and old. I dream of a time when I had my own room. I think of nice clean carpets and ant-less bathrooms. What can do but enjoy it. No use in complaining. The spiders won't listen.
Service:Picked up some trash on campus. Never realized shy people would want to trash this beautiful place.

Day Seven: Declared

I am declaring a major today. English Literature. Yep it's true. So today for service I helped my roommate with her English homework. It was so fun! I love English and learning and reading and writing. So much can be explored in literature and so much more can be explored when you write down your thoughts. That is the main reason I started this Blog. Yes, I live in a hole and yes, it is very difficult, but I get to capture my dreams everyday by writing down my thoughts and ideas. Life is full of adventure and awesome-ness if you look closely. Do not miss out on the great opportunities around you. Spend more time getting to know yourself. Look at the beautiful around you. Don't take anything for granted. Don't close your eyes during the best part of the movie!

Thank You Day 6

Thank you. Thank you for being in my life. Thank you for talking to me today. Thank you for reading this. I believe that one of the most meaningful acts of service we can give is telling someone a heartfelt thank you. Those words, when used correctly, can give someone a feeling of confidence. Those words can make someone smile. And thank you can tell someone how much you appreciate them. Today I told someone thank you...and it was sincere.

Day 5

Service today was telling a girl she dropped her orange. Not really service, but maybe she really wanted that orange. I am terrible at service. The beaches at Hawaii are beautiful. Swimming in the Ocean is salty. I love the feeling of being lifted by a way. It's like flying. One moment your feet are on the sandy ground and the next you are floating. The ocean is so peaceful and I love being here, not having lots of worries and stresses, but just sitting. It's probably what Jack Johnson does all day. Although, I have found it hard being so "free." I have found myself become very bored...Maybe I should just enjoy the liberty, but liberty is not as easy and nice as it seems.

Day 4

Today I had the chance of meeting two of the most pessimistic people on Oahu. One of my pet peeves is a bad attitude. I met a guy at lunch who basically told me everything in the world he hates. Now it was a long list of hated items and when I asked him if he hated everything, he told me that he was "very opinionated about the things I hate." Now, let me say something about his vocabulary choice. For starters, hate is a very strong word. It should be used only when needed, not thrown into conversations like the word "the." Also, everyone is entitled to their own opinion, BUT an opinion should be well thought out. If all this guy does is tell people all the things he hates, who is going to want to tell him anything?
The second person was a girl, so a different kind of pessimism, but still negative. She went on and on about how she is a straight up jerk, and she never wants to be skinny,and skinny girls are obnoxious and more. Lot's more. I do my best to find the good in people. Especially if it is someone I don't like as well. Pessimism is never a good option.
Service of the day: I carried a girl's backpack to her. She had gone swimming and brought her backpack to her. The End

Day 3

Today an elderly lady dropped her papers and I picked them up for her. That's my service. I have come to the realization that Hawaii is very beautiful and even though I am the same person, Hawaii makes me want to be a different and perhaps better person. I have decided to walk slower, enjoying the beauty all around me. I have the desire to wake up earlier and not miss any moment of life in paradise. I have also wanted to appreciate more the people around me and the blessings I receive from the Lord everyday. I am not alone here. I never have been. After talking with my cousin I realized that life is hard, but good comes from hard things and growth is a necessary part of living. I want to live not merely exist. So with each day being a new day, I am going to say my ABC's...you'll see.

Day 2

Service of the day: held the door open for a girl.
Thought of the day: Friends are important.
I have been thinking about my friends. Being away from them has made me realize how much I like them. Ever noticed when you are with someone that you find every little thing about them that bugs you? Well, I did that with my friends and now not having friends has made me realize that good or bad, friends are friends. Sometimes I take for granted the great people that have helped me become who I am. Then I think of all the ways I could have been a better friend to them. Then I am depressed. So, instead of being depressed I am going to be a better friend. Staring off with my roommate. She is a great person and I need all the great people in my life I can find. Here's a shout out to all my wonderful friends. I may not deserve you guys, but I need you guys. Salut from my hole.

Day One

Never in my life did I realize how hard it is to find service opportunities. Maybe I just didn't look for it before, but I had a hard time. You might think that this good deed wan't so good, but in my it counts. While sitting with my roommate doing some homework I decided i wanted some starbursts, a favorite candy of mine. So instead of chowing down by myself, I asked my kind roommate to join me. We sat and feasted on starbursts and occasionally made casual conversation.

A Better Idea

Each day in my hole I wonder what brought me to Hawaii in the first place. This was not what I planned and not that I am complaining, but I gave up a lot for this. The time I am spending over here might have been better spent in my home state with the people I know and love. This might have been the stupidest idea I ever will have, but it was a decision already made. So while I sit and blog in my hole I am going to choose a new path while living here. Each day is new and each day i can be better. I may not have friends, family or even a roommate I can talk to, but the people here deserve everything and probably more that I do. It is my goal to serve one person each day. It could be small or big, seen or unseen, but I will do it. Not only will it take my mind off the cruel people I have met here, but it will teach me how to love others with sincerity. Wish me luck.

My hole in the wall.

I recently moved into a hole. To be exact I now reside in a very small bedroom. Not only is it small but I share it with another person. It is also the residene of several traveling bugs/spiders. But it is my hole, well part mine and I call it home-ish.